My Heart is Home: Hidden Creek Series #2 Read online

  My Heart is Home

  Hidden Creek Series #2

  Barbara Gee

  Copyright ©2018 by Barbara S. Gunden

  All rights Reserved

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events, and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events, is purely coincidental.

  This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of Barbara Gunden, except for the use of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

  Chapter 1

  “I

  ’ve got this. Don’t worry about me. You’re marrying the love of your life today, and I couldn’t be happier for you.”

  That’s what I’d told my best friend, the bride, right before I stepped outside and stood on trembling legs, awaiting my cue. The "I couldn’t be happier for you" part was totally sincere and true. The "I’ve got this" claim…uh, not so much. Yet here I was, about to play my part in Ava’s beautiful backyard wedding, desperately hoping I could pull off a calm, serene façade even though on the inside I was a total shaky mess.

  I drew in a breath and let it out slowly, then looked over at Priscilla, the elderly lady in charge of sending us girls down the grassy aisle at the right time. She was taking her job very seriously and had popped her head into the house earlier to make sure we were dressed and ready.

  “You,” she’d said, pointing at me. “You missed the rehearsal last night, so do exactly as I say today. No lollygagging or you won’t be in place by the time the musicians finish the song. But you can’t go too fast either. Slow, even steps. Got it?”

  I assured her I did, and then she’d warmed a bit and told me it was good to see me again before hurrying back to her post.

  Now it was showtime and I saw that Priscilla had just sent the bridesmaid, Hannah, on her way, and the maid of honor was up next. That was me. I prayed Hannah would walk really, really slowly, giving me time for a few more deep, calming breaths. I so didn’t have this.

  I managed only one inhale and most of an exhale before Priscilla urgently waved me over to get in position. I obediently walked across the lush grass, past a line of at least a dozen ceramic flower pots overflowing with brilliant blooms, stopping at the aisle between rows of white chairs filled with the friends and family of Ava Milton—my best friend from the age of eight—and her fiancé, Jude Keller.

  I kept my eyes firmly fixed on Hannah’s back, waiting for Priscilla’s prompt.

  When I say my eyes were fixed on Hannah, I mean they were completely glued to her, because I was terrified of looking anywhere else. I didn’t want to look at the crowd of friends and family who would soon be craning their necks to get a look at the girl who had slunk out of town and not been back for more than three years. I didn’t want to look at the groom, because I didn’t want him to see my terror and feel bad about the fact that his wedding was putting me in the spotlight for all to gawk at.

  Most of all, I didn’t want to look at the groom’s brother, the best man, who was the reason for my current state of near panic. He was also the reason this woman scorned had left town three-and-a-half years ago, sneaking out in the dead of night, so to speak, with a broken heart I still hadn’t recovered from.

  Jedidiah Patterson Keller. JP. The very last person in the world I wanted to see. I could honestly say there was no circumstance other than this one where I would have agreed to be anywhere near the man. Even though he was the brother of the groom, I selfishly resented his presence. I wanted to rejoice and celebrate with Ava on her special day, not worry about avoiding him.

  “Go now,” Priscilla whispered. “Remember, nice even steps.”

  I nodded and clutched my bouquet tighter as I began my trek down the aisle. I was vaguely aware of the feel of my pretty aqua dress swirling around my calves, and the subtle scents of flowers and fresh cut grass. I was much more aware of all the heads turning in my direction, and I had to fight the urge to speed to the front and get this over with. Only my fear of Priscilla’s wrath kept me at the proper pace.

  When Hannah reached her designated spot and turned to face the crowd, smiling widely, I shifted my focus from her to the empty space beside her. The place I would soon fill. I hoped my own smile didn’t look as fixed and strained as it felt.

  Not once did I look directly at the three big male shapes looming at the end of the aisle. I couldn’t. My first glimpse of JP Keller after all this time was not going to happen in front of a hundred witnesses. If I had my way, it wouldn’t happen at all.

  Yet each step took me closer to him. There was nothing I could do. I felt my face heating up and I hoped he couldn’t see the flush—I didn’t want him to know he could still affect me. If only I had the nerve to look him right in the eye and smirk with disdain, letting him know I was so over him it wasn’t even funny. That smirk, along with the fact that my handsome boyfriend was in the crowd, would have made exactly the statement I desired.

  Unfortunately, the boyfriend would have to be statement enough, because I couldn’t manage even a brief glance, much less the required level of disdain.

  I walked by the groom and took my place beside Hannah, slowly letting out the breath I’d been holding. Keeping my pasted-on smile in place, I anxiously awaited the entrance of the gorgeous bride. I wanted all eyes on her and off me.

  The cellist and violinist began playing “Canon in D” right on cue, and as the beautiful, soul-stirring music floated out over the pristine backyard where Jude stood just to my left awaiting that first glimpse of his bride, my tension began to ease and my smile suddenly, finally, became real. Ah, yes. This was the good part. This was where my best friend began her happily ever after.

  Ava appeared in the back, on the arm of her proud dad. Priscilla gave the signal and everyone rose, a buzz of whispers becoming audible over the music—because she was just that lovely and people couldn’t help but comment.

  I was so happy for her. So thrilled that she was marrying the love of her life. Jude was a great guy and the two of them were perfect together.

  But I despised Jude’s brother.

  ***

  Ava ran over to hug me as the photographer was trying to line up the wedding party for pictures.

  “I’m married, Myla, can you even believe it? I’m Ava Keller now. Does that sound fabulous or what?”

  “So fabulous,” I said, grinning and hugging her back. “You’re going to be blissfully happy together.”

  “I know.” Ava squeezed me harder, then let go and looked at me earnestly. “The wedding wouldn’t have been the same without you here. Have I thanked you enough for coming? I’m so grateful, Myla.”

  “I wouldn’t have missed it,” I said. I meant it too, I really did, but now that she was happily hitched, I was itching to leave. I couldn’t, of course, because the maid of honor had responsibilities. But oh, what I wouldn’t give to be able to skip out on the reception and avoid coming face to face with the man who had ruined my life.

  I still hadn’t looked directly at him, not even when I’d had to take his arm to follow the bride and groom back up the aisle. I’d barely touched him, my fingers resting gingerly on the fabric of his jacket sleeve where it bunched at his elbow. But then he’d drawn his arm—and my hand—in close to his side, and the warmth of him radiating out through his suit to my skin had almost made my knees buckle.

  I can do this. I can do this for Ava. I repeated that over and over in my head, but the mantra was hard to make out over the whooshing of my heartbeat in my ears.

&
nbsp; Sheer force of will had kept me going. As soon as we cleared the last row I yanked my hand away and turned my back on him, going over to hug Hannah because she was close and I needed something to do.

  I didn’t care what JP thought of my evasive tactics. I was still emotional from the beautiful ceremony and this was definitely not the time to look into his eyes and see everything I’d lost.

  If circumstances were different, I’d have made it my life goal to avoid him the entire evening. But he was the best man and I was the maid of honor, and although I’d convinced Ava not to include the wedding party in the first dance, I knew I’d have to acknowledge him at some point. I just hoped any interaction we were forced to have would be brief.

  Unfortunately, I couldn’t say brief and painless, because for me, pain and JP went hand in hand.

  “Okay, ladies,” the photographer called out, clapping her hands to get our attention. “You’re over here by Ava, and guys, stand by your man. Just a few shots and then you can join the guests in the reception tent while I get the family photos.”

  I managed what I hoped was a radiant-looking smile while the gal posed us and snapped away. I was terrified her next request would be for a shot of the maid of honor and best man, but she didn’t go there. Ava had most likely anticipated that uncomfortable moment and headed it off. She really was the best friend a girl could ask for…aside from the fact that she’d fallen in love with my ex’s brother.

  Hannah grabbed my arm as soon as the wedding party photos were a wrap.

  “Come on, Myla, let’s go find something to drink.” She cast a furtive glance over her shoulder as we walked away, then leaned in closer to me. “Ava asked me to walk you over to the tent to meet up with Derek so things don’t get awkward. And she has us all sitting in one long row for the meal, so you don’t have to worry about sitting across from JP. Or beside him.”

  “I would’ve been fine with whatever,” I lied.

  Hannah chuckled softly. “Yeah, that’s why you haven’t even looked at him yet.” She patted my arm. “That’s okay. We do what we have to do to survive these situations.”

  I had only met Hannah forty-five minutes before the wedding had started, but I liked her already. She was four months pregnant with her first child and over the moon about it. I knew she and Ava had become good friends, and I wished I had more time to get to know her myself.

  “Oh, there he is,” she said, pointing. “He’s a cutie. You two are a gorgeous couple.”

  I spotted Derek, my boyfriend of three months, waiting for me just inside the elaborate tent that had been set up in Jude’s side yard. Or I should say Jude and Ava’s yard, since this was where they’d be living. Derek smiled and I smiled back, bothered by the fact that my eagerness to get to him was because I needed a shield for the night and not because I wanted to be with him specifically.

  That’s another thing JP Keller was ruining for me. Derek was a super nice guy, the first guy I’d seriously dated since leaving Hidden Creek. And I’d thought we were doing just fine—until I realized I was going to have to make a trip back to Hidden Creek for Ava’s wedding.

  As of that moment, I’d been unable to focus on the future and Derek because I was back in the past with JP. I’d known all too well that setting foot in that town for the first time since I left was going to be excruciating. All the memories would come flooding back and that alone would crush me. Add in the fact that JP was best man to my maid of honor and it felt like my whole world had shifted.

  My extreme reaction to the thought of seeing JP made me question my feelings for Derek. I hated that I was suddenly so uncertain, but I couldn’t ignore the doubt. If I was completely over JP and ready for another relationship, I wouldn’t be so bothered by the thought of seeing him again…..would I?

  It had all made for a rough few weeks. I’d done my best to put JP out of my mind, but it was impossible and I felt terribly guilty. Derek assumed he’d be going along to the wedding and I didn’t dissuade him, but as the days went by and I remained hopelessly tangled up in the past, I wondered if I should come up with an excuse to go alone. Or maybe I should just go ahead and end things with him altogether. On the other hand, what if I impulsively broke up with him, only to find that seeing JP again after all this time wasn’t such a big deal after all?

  In the end I’d chosen to bring Derek, obviously, and he was so sweet during the trip. He was just a sweet guy, period. I’d almost convinced myself he and I were going to be okay, and then we’d driven our rental car through Hidden Creek and I’d been hit with a wave of homesickness that took my breath away. The intense longing for the town I’d grown up in had brought tears to my eyes, and when Derek asked what was wrong I could only shake my head and mumble something about really missing the place.

  The timing of this wedding trip couldn’t have been worse. I was only weeks away from signing up for another two-year enlistment with the Army, and yet with that one pass through town I was envisioning living in Hidden Creek again, with my parents and Ava right there where I could hang out with them any time I wanted. After seeing them so rarely in the past three-and-a-half years, that sounded incredibly good.

  The problem with that scenario? Well, there were actually two of them. First, Derek was still my boyfriend. He was also still in the Army and fully expecting me to reenlist. Just a month ago he’d turned down an opportunity to move to a base in Germany, which is somewhere he’d always wanted to go, in order to stay in Arizona with me.

  The second problem was obvious and pretty much insurmountable. JP Keller still lived in Hidden Creek, Tennessee, and the town wasn’t big enough for both of us.

  Ugh. My emotions were all over the place as Hannah grabbed my hand and walked me straight over to Derek. I’d have to come to terms with my reaction to being back in Hidden Creek at some point, but right now I had a wedding reception to concentrate on.

  “You look gorgeous,” Derek said, his brown eyes warm, “and your friend is a beautiful bride. I’m looking forward to meeting the girl I’ve heard so much about.”

  “She won’t disappoint,” I assured him. “I’m kind of hoping this party doesn’t go too late, though. I’m exhausted from the trip.”

  That claim was legitimate, since our trip had started at three o’clock this morning. We’d actually planned to arrive the day before, but we’d missed our flight—and I was the first to admit that I might have subconsciously (or consciously) made that happen in order to avoid the wedding rehearsal.

  “I’m seated with you at the head table,” Derek said, “which is good, considering I don’t know a soul here. Well, except for your parents. They came up and introduced themselves a little while ago, but it was kinda awkward without you.”

  We were passing the bar and I stopped and asked the bartender for a bottle of water. I gulped some down, then gave Derek a rueful smile. “Sorry about that. We’ll go chat with them after we’re done eating.”

  He shrugged. “No big deal. I knew this would be a busy time for you.”

  I glanced up at him, thankful for his easy-going ways. He was such a nice guy, and so handsome in his navy suit. Even though we’d been stationed on the same base for over a year, we hadn’t met until we’d both been sent to Afghanistan three months ago. It had been such a relief to discover I could feel drawn to someone who wasn’t JP Keller, and that unexpected attraction had caused me to jump into the relationship with both feet.

  And like I said, it had been fine, we were rolling right along—until Ava called and asked me to come to her wedding.

  The whole thing had been a huge shock. I hadn’t even known Ava was dating anyone because the eight-week assignment in Afghanistan had allowed basically no contact with the outside world. In fact, the last time I’d talked to Ava was three days after she’d made the move to Hidden Creek herself, after inheriting her grandmother’s house. I’d been worried about her getting settled in, so naturally my first phone call after getting back to the States had been to her.

 
That’s when she’d broken the news that she was getting married in three weeks. Apparently, it had pretty much been love at first sight for her and Jude, and a long engagement seemed totally unnecessary when they knew without a doubt they were meant to be together.

  I knew what that kind of love felt like.

  Unfortunately, I also knew how it felt to lose it.

  Chapter 2

  D

  erek and I made our way through the crowd to the head table, but it was slow going because so many people wanted to talk to me. All of them were people I hadn’t seen since I hightailed it out of town all those years ago. People who should have felt abandoned by my hasty exit with no good-byes—and maybe they did—but they didn’t show it. I was hugged and squeezed and welcomed home to the point where my heart felt full and kind of achy. I’d all but forgotten what it was like in a small town where everyone knew everyone, but tonight I realized how much I’d missed it.

  When I neared the table where Priscilla and a group of elderly ladies from church were sitting, I knew I was in for a whole new round of “welcome homes.”

  I gave Derek another apologetic look. “Sorry about this,” I muttered, and then my great-aunt Donna had her arms around me, saying it was about time I showed my face in Hidden Creek again. After her long, loving, swaying-in-place hug, I was passed down the line. Rose, Evvie, Constance, Liz, Sarah Beth, and finally Priscilla, who congratulated me on not ruining the wedding processional.

  Of course all the ladies were eager to meet Derek, and he was soon surrounded, sneezing twice into his sleeve when seven different perfumes hit him. They asked question after question, until I finally apologized and said we really needed to get to our table. They let us go, but only after Donna declared we still had a lot of catching up to do and she wanted a call before I left town again.