Know Me, Keep Me (Full Heart Ranch Series Book 3) Read online

  Cameron snickered. “And if he wants more than a friend, you can be that, too.”

  “You got that right,” Izzy said, unabashed. “Who wouldn’t take that opportunity?”

  “Jolene wouldn’t,” Lowell said quietly.

  Izzy snickered. “Because she’s a Bible and church girl, and that scares guys away. Uh, no offense, Jolene,” she said belatedly.

  “I disagree,” Lowell said. “Some men like a girl who doesn’t sleep around.”

  “Most don’t,” Izzy sniped.

  “All right, I think this conversation has run its course.” Jolene said decisively. For the most part her staff respected each other and got along well, but Izzy definitely got under the guys’ skin on occasion. Especially Lowell, who had taken on a big brother role and frequently got on Izzy’s case for being such a party girl.

  Jolene retrieved a stack of folders and handed them out in groups rubber-banded together. “Based on the physical abilities classifications you guys came up with yesterday, I’ve made the assignments for next week’s attendees. Lowell, you have five, the others have four, and I have three, plus Boone. Go ahead and work up your plans for the first week’s sessions. Let’s go with two group sessions per day, ten to a group. We’ll take turns leading those. Lowell, if you could come up with a schedule for that I’d appreciate it. We’ll also have daily one hour individual sessions for each participant. That seems to be a win-win. It makes our days more manageable when we aren’t trying to do so many one-on-one rotations per day, and the vets seem to like working out in groups. It’s motivating for them.”

  “I agree. I’m still getting great responses to the group sessions,” Cameron said.

  “Glad to hear it. If we need to make any changes to the make-up of the groups, we’ll do it in the first day or two, so everyone is as comfortable as possible. And let’s continue to share our ideas and experiences with each other. What works best, new things you try, whatever. This will only be our third retreat using the group model, so I’m sure there’s still lots of room for improvement.”

  “When do you want our plans?” Cameron asked.

  “By the end of the day Friday. That’ll give me the weekend to go over them. I’ll email you any suggested changes before Monday.”

  “You got it, boss,” Greg said.

  The guys headed for their cubicles in the far corner of the large PT room, but Izzy hung back.

  “Hey, Jolene, I didn’t mean anything by what I said. Really. I actually respect your choices. We’re just coming from different places, you know?”

  “I do know,” Jolene said with a smile. In spite of Izzy’s brashness, the girl had a good heart and was proving to be very good at her job. She talked a lot about her social life with her co-workers, but Jolene had never observed her being less than professional with her clients. After her year-long internship was completed, Jolene expected to be able to give her a glowing recommendation to include on her resume.

  “So do you really want me to stay away from Boone, even if by some chance he wants to spend time with me?”

  “No,” Jolene said, keeping her face expressionless even though the possibility was a bit upsetting. “Just let him be the one to do the asking, okay?”

  Izzy sighed. “I’ll try. I’m used to going after what I want, though.”

  Jolene nodded. “I know, but think about it, Iz, A man like Boone has women throwing themselves at him all the time. If I had to guess, I’d say there’s a better chance of standing out to him if you hang back a little and let him make the first move, should he decide he wants to.”

  A slow smile curved Izzy’s full lips. “Well what do you know? My straight-laced boss is actually giving me advice on snagging a man.”

  “I do date, Izzy,” Jolene said, a little exasperated. “And believe it or not, I’ve had several relationships. I’m not totally ignorant of the ways of men.”

  “You just don’t sleep with them.”

  “I don’t,” Jolene confirmed.

  “But how do you resist? I mean, if a man like Boone Kendall wants to sleep with you, are you seriously going to turn him down?”

  “Yep.”

  “You wouldn’t even be tempted?”

  Jolene could have told Izzy it was none of her business, but whenever the girl gave her the opportunity to share her convictions, she took it.

  “Of course I’d be tempted. But I’d also regret it if I followed through, because it would mean abandoning my beliefs and values to have a fling. I’d be awfully disappointed in myself if I made that choice.”

  “Would you kiss him? Or are you one of those people who think you shouldn’t even hold hands until you’re married?”

  “I’m definitely not averse to kissing. I won’t kiss a random guy at a club, but if I’m in a relationship, or even seriously dating someone, I enjoy kissing as much as the next girl. It’s just that I won’t go so far I can’t stop.”

  “So you know your limits and you won’t go beyond them, to the point of no return?”

  “Exactly.”

  Izzy looked thoughtful. “I can respect that. I might even envy you just a tiny bit. But let’s say you slip up. Then what? Are you damaged goods and God hates you forever?”

  “Absolutely not. There’s nothing I can do to make Him hate me, and He doesn’t hold my mistakes against me. Jesus died for all my sins, past and future. It’s the gift of forgiveness and grace. So, when I screw up, I learn from it and try to do better the next time.”

  “So why not just have an amazing night with a guy like Boone, then get forgiven and move on? I mean, if God is so forgiving, work it, girl!”

  “I’ve known people who operate that way,” Jolene replied, “but I want to maintain a relationship with God. A real one, not a one-sided one. If you have a relationship with someone who lets you down and then says they’re sorry and begs for forgiveness, only to do it all over again and again, you know the relationship can’t be sustained. That person obviously doesn’t care about you the way they say they do, and eventually they’ll forsake you. I don’t want to be like that with God. I want to show Him I appreciate His gift of grace by living the way He wants me to live, and not giving in to temptations and then having to ask for forgiveness all the time. Especially if I’m doing the same thing over and over.”

  Izzy frowned. “Seems to me God is asking an awful lot.”

  “I can see why you think that. But in my opinion, He gives even more.”

  “Like what?” Izzy wondered.

  “Contentment. Peace. Acceptance of who I am. A sense of belonging and fellowship with others who share my beliefs. The assurance of knowing a higher power is in control when I’m not. The promise of heaven.” Jolene grinned. “To name a few.”

  “Don’t be offended, but it sounds a little crazy to me. Like a cult or something.”

  “Except that Christianity is built on loving Christ and your fellow man, not pledging allegiance to a mortal man who has something to gain.” Jolene gave her friend a warm smile. “And God’s grace is available to everyone, regardless. All they have to do is open their heart to him. You can’t say all that about a cult.”

  Izzy appeared skeptical, but Jolene hoped that perhaps a tiny seed had been planted. She tapped the stack of folders Izzy was holding.

  “Sermon over, girlfriend. Let’s get to work.”

  “Sure, okay.” Izzy bit her lip. “Thanks for not getting mad at me. I’m glad I can ask you questions without worrying about my job, because I really do enjoy it here. All four of us think you’re the best therapist we’ve ever worked with. It’s like it just comes so naturally to you.”

  “You’re a natural yourself, Izzy. In a couple of years you’ll give me a run for my money.”

  “That’s so nice of you to say,” Izzy said around a huge smile. “Thanks, boss. I’ll get to work now.”

  Izzy hurried off and Jolene returned to her desk, thankful she’d been given the chance to talk to the girl, hoping she’d said the right things
. She took the time to say a quick prayer for guidance, then settled in to work for the rest of the morning.

  CHAPTER 7

  It was a few minutes after noon when Jolene finished her last morning session and hurried to change out of her exercise clothes. She always took a change of clothes to work with her, just in case she needed to leave the campus. Because walking around town in yoga pants was definitely not her thing.

  This morning she’d spent a little extra time choosing the extra outfit, on the off chance that Boone would be the reason she’d need it. She’d picked out a short, coral colored cotton skirt and a three-quarter sleeved white knit top with a scoop neck. She knew the outfit flattered her slender build and skin tone, but the look was still casual and comfortable and didn’t look like she was trying too hard. A tan belt and matching wedge heels, not too high and not too low, completed the outfit.

  She let her hair out of the pony tail, relieved to see that the imprint from the hair band blended into the natural wave of her hair. Satisfied with her appearance, she texted Boone and told him she was ready to take him into town.

  He replied back right away, saying he was on his way. Jolene went outside, leaning against her car and enjoying the spring sunshine while she waited for him.

  A few minutes later he walked around the corner of the building, dressed in jeans and a heather gray tee shirt with the Chicago Bears logo front and center. Her heart jumped once at the sight of him, and then again when he gave her a slow smile.

  “You didn’t waste any time,” she said, keeping her tone light. “Let me guess, you’re hungry?”

  “Always. It’s a curse.” His eyes flickered warmly over her. “You look great, Jolene. I wasn’t sure I’d ever see you in anything other than workout gear.”

  “Thanks,” she said a little self-consciously. They got into her Honda Civic and Boone immediately slid his seat all the way back in an effort to accommodate his long legs.

  “Did you meet up with Donovan at the rink?”

  “I did. Spent the last couple hours with him. The guy has a great vision for this place.”

  “We’re so fortunate to have him here. He’s had a lot of experience working with wounded warriors, as I’m sure you found out. And the fact that he’s already spent time working with vets who’ve lost one or both legs and need to use sleds to play hockey is huge for us.”

  “Yeah, it’s a whole different game from a sled, that’s for sure. It’s basically just a seat on a blade. I tried one and man, I was awful.”

  “You should keep trying, so you know what the vets are facing.”

  “I plan on it. It’ll be a challenge to give them a good base in hockey when they’re only here for two weeks, but Donovan has a lot of great ideas. I’m excited about it.”

  “How does your head feel?” Jolene asked as she pulled out of the parking lot.

  “Staying pretty steady at a three or four.” Putting his pain level into a one to ten number range had become so routine in the past six weeks Boone didn’t even have to think about it anymore.

  “Are you usually higher at this time of day?”

  “Sometimes, not always. If I wake up with a two or a three, it often stays that way unless I really exert myself. If I wake up with a four or five, it seems like it goes up as the day goes on. And on the real bad days, I wake up with a seven or eight and that’s where it stays. I haven’t had that happen in a while, though, so I suppose that’s a bit of good news.”

  “Thanks for not trying to hide the headaches from me. I can’t help you if I don’t know what’s really going on.”

  He winced. “I kinda tried that for a while with the team medical staff. I thought I was getting better, even though I still had some headaches on and off. I was convinced I could play through it, so I didn’t reveal how bad they got. Three weeks after I got hit they let me back on the ice for limited practice, but then the dizziness started. I’ll admit that scared me, and when I finally confessed it, they yanked me. I haven’t done more than skate laps since. And I got more than one lecture about the possibility of causing permanent damage by going back too soon.”

  “I’m sorry the rest of the season is a bust for you, especially when you guys were doing so great. I was sure you’d have a play-off berth this year.”

  “Yeah, it sucks. I’ve never been out more than a few games for an injury, and to tell you the truth, I’m not sure how I’ll feel the first time I play Scott Satchell again,” Boone said, referring to the player who had given him a vicious cross-check to the back of the head and caused the concussion.

  “I’d have mixed feelings, too,” Jolene admitted. “If it had been a clean hit, or even a nasty hit without intent, I could get over it. But the man has a history of dirty, malicious plays, and it was a cowardly hit from behind after you’d already gone down. If you ask me, he meant to injure you, and I don’t care if it was in the heat of a close game. That excuse doesn’t fly with me.”

  “Lots of people say that’s just hockey. Not for the faint of heart.”

  “Oh, I enjoy the scrums and the good checks as much as the next person. It’s a self-governing game in many ways, and I respect that. But the play had already ended when Satchell cross-checked you. He wasn’t playing the game, he was trying to hurt you. And it wasn’t even retaliation for you checking one of his teammates—it was just a nasty hit because he’s a nasty person. He should have been suspended for the rest of the season.”

  Boone chuckled. “I appreciate your passion for the game.”

  “Hey, he hurt my main guy, and the team isn’t the same without you.”

  Jolene slowed at the gate, giving the guard a smile and a wave. They talked hockey the rest of the way to Barlow, and if Boone had doubted her love for the game before, he didn’t any longer.

  “We’ll eat lunch before we shop, since you’re so hungry,” she said graciously. “The Barlow Diner is our only choice, but don’t worry. It won’t disappoint. And save room for the peanut butter pie.”

  ***

  Boone put on the ball cap and sunglasses he’d brought, but he was pretty sure he didn’t actually need them. Barlow was a tiny western town, with a whopping 1,200 population. He knew that, because he’d researched everything about the Full Heart Ranch, including the closest town. And Barlow certainly didn’t appear to be a hockey town. He’d be much more recognizable here if he rode bulls or roped calves.

  Jolene, on the other hand, was apparently very well known. She seemed to know everyone in the diner, and they all wanted to say hello. As they walked to a booth in the back corner, she warmly greeted those who called out to her, introducing Boone as “Mr. Kendall,” a new volunteer at the ranch. When they sat down at the table, she gave him a worried look.

  “I hope I didn’t make you sound uppity with the ‘Mr. Kendall’ bit. I just thought in case there are any hockey fans in here, the name Boone might ring more bells than Kendall.”

  He slid off the sunglasses and turned his cap around backwards. “You did fine. Do you know everyone in town, or just the ones who happen to be in here?”

  She smiled. “It’s a small town, with tons of opportunities to get to know people. Lots of community folk volunteer at the center, too, and then there’s church and stuff. So yeah, it’s not hard to get to know a majority of the people who live here.”

  “You go to church?”

  ***

  Jolene studied him for a moment, not sure she was ready for another discussion of her ‘religion’ after her recent talk with Izzy. “Yeah, I do,” she said simply.

  “I’m guessing Tuck, Maddy, Ryan and Libby do, too.”

  “They do,” Jolene confirmed. She leaned forward, resting her forearms on the table. “Does that make you uncomfortable?”

  He cocked a brow. “Should it?”

  “Not in my opinion, but I know some people find it off-putting. They assume Christians are judgmental and will take every opportunity to preach to them.”

  “I don’t find it off-putting. I
go to church myself whenever I get the chance. Doesn’t always happen during the season, obviously, but I’m pretty regular in the off season. And Jax, me, and a couple other guys from the team try to get together at least once a month for dinner and Bible study.”

  Jolene sat back, suddenly very disappointed in herself for assuming he wasn’t a believer. “I’m sorry, Boone. I guess I was being judgmental after all.”

  He smiled over his menu. “I figured as my number one fan you’d have heard me give credit to God for my success. I try to do it often.”

  “Oh I’ve definitely heard it, but a lot of athletes say that. I figured it was just the accepted thing to do.” She hunched her shoulders. “I really am sorry.”

  “Don’t worry about it.”

  “Did you grow up in a Christian home?” Jolene wondered.

  His body tensed at her question. “Uh, no. The teammate who helped me straighten up my act after my rookie season was also the one responsible for getting me on the straight and narrow.”

  “Good for him. Are you two still in touch?”

  “Yeah, he’s retired now and I rarely see him, but we talk every week or two. He helps keep me accountable. If I screw up, he’s not shy about letting me know it.”

  “It’s good to have those people in our lives.”

  Their waitress came over and they ordered, chicken salad for Jolene and a burger and fries for Boone. And of course the peanut butter pie, because it was so worth the splurge.

  “Tell me more about your childhood,” Jolene said when they were alone again.

  Boone took a long drink of the ice water the waitress had set before him. “Not much to tell. I grew up in Chicago and showed a talent for hockey early on, so from the age of six, that was my life. I went to school and to the rink. Not much else.”

  “Is it what you wanted, or did your parents push you?”

  “I wanted it. My parents would have supported whatever I wanted to do.”

  “Are you close to them? Or has your busy life taken its toll?”